Day 6: Hope for Your Marriage
Learning to Submit in your marriage
I grew up in a single parent household. It was my mother, older sister, and I. My mother did everything for us. She worked, cooked, cleaned, clothed … you get the picture. She supplied all our basic needs, or so we thought. Now I am an adult, who is happily married with lovely children. But what a rocky road our marriage was at first! I was quite the unbridled bride. I am still a work in progress, but Coach Cotch, my husband, loves me still. Not having a clear leader within the household growing up deposited many unspoken personality traits into my character. But God, our God, who is slow to anger and abounding in love has gently shown me a far richer way to live. God has graciously given me the desire to please Him. In marriage, I imagine that I am most pleasing to Him when my posture towards my spouse imitates scripture. And what does Scripture command of me?
“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord."-Eph. 5:22
We all have our very own idea of what submission is. Many of you likely cringe at the slightest mention of the word. Trust me when I tell you, submission truly is for your good. When we submit to someone else’s authority, any wrongdoing done under the watch of that figure of authority defaults back to him. Hence when we are submitted under someone else’s authority, it keeps us blameless. When Eve, all beautiful and naked, boldly conversed with Satan and ate the forbidden fruit along with her husband who was silently with her, God came looking for Adam.
“But the Lord God called to the man and said to him, ‘Where are you?’" -Genesis 3:9
Though the woman was deceived, God came to discuss matters with Adam. Why? Because God created Adam first (1 Timothy 2:13). In so doing, God gave us order. (We learned this in an earlier blog post found here.) The order in no way insinuates that women are inferior to men. Rather it echoes that we are not superior.
What a beautiful picture when you consider that we are ultimately called to submit to God’s authority, who, in love, sent his son Jesus to take the blame for our sins. When we surrender ourselves unto the Lord, we are no longer responsible for our sins. Christ took the blame for us all already. Instead of silently sitting by like the first Adam, Christ, the last Adam, took our sin and shame. He took our blame. He allowed our God to pour out all His anger and judgement on Him. The full wrath of God was bestowed upon Christ.
What do you say? Can you submit to your husbands, knowing that it is a mirror of your submission to Christ? If you find this difficult, take an honest look at your standing with the Lord. If you feel like you need help, be courageous and sit down with a pastor. There is some good-living available to you. You do not have to be miserable within your marriage. Hope is waiting.